Throughout life, we all search for true happiness. Whether we're the artist picturing the perfect piece or the hopeless lover hoping to find their opposite, yet equally perfect partner. Even the philosophers argue over what contends as true happiness.
Weed, women, money, possessions, work, interests...all of these things we all stumble upon in our lives and have to make the crucial decision whether they may or may not be the root of our happiness, be it past, present, or the desired future.
Since 2007 I haven't been truly happy...bottom line. As far as money, I learned some lessons wasting my high school earnings and learned I can rely on no one, including family. Ever since my first love slipped through my arms through the dreaded inaction phase, my life has been hazy. A mix of weed, narcissism, and a Depression have spiraled me towards a wormhole. I've been acting for almost 3 years, showing people from North America to Europe to Africa how much I enjoy life and happy I am...nothing but lies. I am a psychologist, its my job (an excuse, mind you) to stay disconnected.
Complete disconnection is impossible. To fill the void of a warm body, I've been a user and abuser of many a female. Filling holes of married women, fragile women, and perhaps worst of all, manipulable women. All beautiful, 7/10 women had their beauty in looks, the others in some trait I have used and manipulated to my advantage. Alas, this is the past...I am writing this at such a late hour because the containment that lies within me is so great that I'm trying to procrastinate writing what confuses me so much.
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